As I was driving home on Wednesday night I decided to listen to a sermon that a friend of ours had given us to listen to. The sermon started off talking Job and how some of his loss was due to natural disasters and other people causing problems. Then it turned to Joseph and how he never gave up on God. Mind you this is the third sermon in a row that Joseph has been brought up. I knew there was something for me to learn from him. I'll share that in a minute. The preacher got to a part in his sermon where I just felt Jesus was with me... How long will you grieve, How long will you grieve...How long will you grieve.( he said this three times and it sank a little more every time) Before you let God restore. I immediately started praying as if my life depended on it. God spoke that directly to my heart from this man. It has been no secret that this has been a season in my life of intense grieving. I have been carrying grief because I felt it was the only way people would not forget about him. If I was sad then they couldn't forget. He's worth so much more than sorrow. I felt in that moment it was ok to let go. Not forget, or never be sad or, never let a memory cross my mind. But to let go of the bitterness, the why me attitude. I'm a believer in Christ and I believe he works all things out for his good, why couldn't I believe this to would happen to me.
I'm ready to let God restore. To not dwell on the past and look forward to the future he has planned for us. I remember in the days right after Jaxxon left us that people would say HE has a mighty plan for you. I can't wait to see what God does. I remember believing that and then somewhere along the way I have lost sight of that. What God can do to bring glory to him through us is unimaginable. I can remember as if it was ten minutes ago Brett saying from behind the pulpit at Jaxx's funeral that he can feel Jesus walking by. I just forgot he was carrying me.
Back to Joseph many of you know the story of his coat of many colors. And how his brothers were going to kill him, he was accused of raped and was imprisoned, forgotten about for two years after interpreting a dream, then he was made the ruler of Egypt only the Pharaoh was greater than he. Through all this he had Gods favor b/c he was faithful and not saying God why is this happening to me. He knew God would take care of him. I have easy issues compared to this guy but I whine and complain and carry on. We can all learn a lesson from Joseph but I certainly need it. When God blessed him with his son he said that God has allowed me to be fruitful in the land of my grief. That is my prayer that the Lord will make me fruitful in the land that I have grieved. How long have you grieved over something, like a lost job, moving to a smaller house, those size 8 jeans, or something as big as loss of a family member, remember that in there God has to be allowed to restore. Thank you Jesus for making everything new and restoring my heart for you!